I spoke with a potential future work colleague yesterday after sending an amusing (well, I thought it was amusing) SMS to a group of friends, to which I received a not-so-polite followup that I was maybe pushing the boundaries of personal/professional relationship before she even started working with us.
[btw, the message was 'New word of the week 'man-clam' *smile*' or something to that effect]
Now I followed this call up with a (attempted) friendly response indicating that we weren’t yet working together, the SMS was funny, it was sent to all my friends and it (in all honesty) wasn’t exactly that crude. On top of that I was hoping that it would be seen as a light-hearted remark taken with all the respect of somebody who sends stupid messages after hours.
From my perspective, I would have this conversation with my boss, and i’d certainly have it with my colleagues (a good sense of humour is paramount I believe). However her concerns did make me consider that while there is certainly a perception that i’ve grown up a lot in some areas, that there is still the (incorrect) presumption that i’m not able to control my other brain impulses and that will have a negative impact on our work together.
This persons perspective is that work and social lives are completely seperate (to which I honestly agree) however it did make me wonder if as part of getting older, one realises that the emotional baggage that some of us carried when we were 20 simply doesn’t exist anymore, and it’s time to realise that the things I wrote about even 3 years ago (go back and check of some of my first posts, I just did) are no longer me.
Yes folks, growing up is hard to do.
In short: I am a professional, I am a senior manager and when i’m at work, I exist for one function, to ensure that my job is done to the best of my ability to achieve maxmimum results for my employer. Outside of work I live a fruitful personal life, of which I share certain snippets with my work colleagues (yes, they know if I get ridiculously drunk on the weekends and my sporting stupidities), however when i’m in the office, if you work for/with/beside/around me, i’m your boss/colleague/mentor/project manager and that professional line is clearly delineated.
I do actually understand how this person feels. To work in an organisation where peoples (distored) perception was reality as opposed to organisations who judge you on your ability to produce results is something that is incredibly difficult to communicate.
I suppose growing up takes time, but it’s going to be a while before everyone realises that I really am an adult now and this really is an adult job that’s being taken….
Adam
16:22 on August 20th, 2007
I think maybe you’re missing the point here. This seems like a simple request from a work colleague, not an attack on your professional conduct here.
Me? I don’t go for work drinks with my colleagues. It’s just something I prefer not to do it. But if a work mate got offended by it or saw it as a personal attack I’d have to tell them to pull their head in.
Surely the grown up thing to do is to respect their request and boundaries and not take it as a personal insult.