In response
# How you can be nice to a girls face, but then months later shit all over her by fucking her boyfriend… upon asking why you completed this act of terrorism, i’m informed “because that dirty bitch spilled a drink on me when we were at x club 6 months ago” ….. (yes, i’ve really heard that quote) - What the!?!?!?
Ok these girls are the lowest form of scum. These are the same girls that fake pregnancies to keep their boyfr ends, sleep with their friends boys just because they can, cheat on their boyfriends and mind fuck people just for the hell of it. I don’t like these girls and they give normal decent girls a really bad whore of a name.
btw - I think it might be just the town you live in A.
# Shoes!?!?! - I’ve got 3 pairs of shoes, and even that’s getting out of control. You have shoes that I can’t even pronounce, and you’d gladly sell you soul, your first-born and your husband all for the latest designer snake-skin pumps that are all the rage….
Ok I have no defence for this, touche. But only if they were Hermes or Prada - I do have standards.
# Still on shoes (sortoff) …. You: Fab dress, fab hair, fab shoes, fab everything …. Us: Comfy shoes, comfy clothes, comfortable….. Setting: Party, restaurant, night club, anywhere…..
5:00pm: You: You look *awful* in that, get changed, I’m not going out with you looking like that!
5:30pm: You: I’m just going to change into something more “moody” …..
9:00pm (2 hours late): You: “Sorry we’re late, but Adam, stupid fool that he is couldn’t find the way here!”
Us: (seething) ….. but honey, weren’t you going through the *entire fucking wardrobe!* before you finally decided on the first dress of the night…..
9:01pm: Us: single 
(kidding)
9:05pm: You: My feet hurt, and everyone’s looking at me in this short top where my tits are all the way out!
Us: “Hey, Matt!, *phew*, thank fuck, the missus started whinging
Matt: *nod* *nod*
9:06pm: You: “Oh my god, we’re so leaving!”
Us: “heh??”
You: “She’s wearing the same dress as me!”
Us: “so?”
You: *slap!*
You’re getting the picture here…..
I can only speak on my behalf, but I can honestly say I don’t do that. This girl sounds like a high maintenance pain in the arse
Also unfortunately girls are expected to dress up when we go out. While it’s perfectly acceptable for a guy to wear jeans and a t/shirt out to any of the above named places it’s not for girls.
Also if we went out looking like crap, guess who’d be the first one to complain?
# Amount of times in a day you can love/hate/be indifferent about your “best” friend: 1,279 - What’s with that! .. they’re you’re best friend.. why don’t you just do what males do and not talk to each other for 14 months, forget what you were pissed about in the first place and get over it!
Ah but whereas it takes a boy 14 months to get over something, girls generally get over stuff much quicker. So we get pissed at them for an hour or so, speak to them, tell them we’re pissed off, they apologise, we get over it. Much easier. It’s just how girl friendships work.
# Women who have never had an orgasm! … That’s just fucked up… I mean seriously. It’s your body, it has parts that allow you to experience pleasure, without assistance from a man. How the *fuck* do you expect me to know how to bring you to raging orgasm when you’ve never had one! ….. Give us a little bit of credit…
Stupid uptight girls. I have no comeback for this, in fact I tend to agree with Adam, girls go sex toy shopping with Adam, it’s the only way.
# “yes, yes yes yes yes, now now now now now now! ….. No wait!! .. Noooooooooooooo” - AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!
Just because you’re lag time is 2.5 minutes doesn’t mean ours is, learn to love it. Unless of course you’re not doing anything for us and we faked that 
- You’re sitting down, so we can’t stare at the other parts of your body we’d like to without it looking totally ridiculous.
Try a little harder, if I walked around only looking at a guys packages I wonder what the reaction would be.
# And by far the most heinous of all female crimes…… Sleeping/Dating/Marrying cruel, dumb fuck, mindless, wankers/assholes/inbreds…..
Why do women date guys who are going to: ignore them, treat them like shit, spend all their time with their mates, expect them to clean up after them …. the list goes on and on and on… And women actively tell me on a regular basis that they like a “bit of a bad boy” ….
I can’t explain the nice guys finish last phenomenon, it’s not something that we’re particularly proud of or that makes any sense whatsoever. If it makes you feel any better the bad boys end up alone or unhappily married to the whores from the first point and the nice guys usually win in the end after the girl finally gets bored with the fuckwits.] and comes to her senses.
Plus nice guys are kinda grating, especially the ones who are so attentive you want to scream and let you get away with murder. There’s a very fine line between being nice and being a doormat.
I also can’t explain the bad boy thing, at all. There’s just something about them that makes up for all the emotional torment, the nights spent at home waiting for a call, the missed birthdays and events, the unreliability. But it wears off very, very quickly and then we realise that the nice boys are actually the best thing in the world.
I’ve told women, to their face, that i’m not interested in them… nada, zip, bubkiss… get outta here!, for them to then follow me around for the rest of the night buying me drinks! ….
Maybe it’s just because you’re shithot, or it could be the country town you live in where the girls are kinda scary.
- Haven’t you been reading this page for the last month? 
* Me, uncomplicated…. fuck no…
* Wonton, damm, that boys heading down adam-alley at a blazing pace while I head towards normalcy.
* Matt, his mates are here for him, but he’s got all his own shit that he’s dealing with…
You’re asking the wrong crew i’s be thinki’……
Yeah but we all know that you guys aren’t a typical bunch of boys, the best looking? yes but the most normal, hell no
I think maybe we’ll just have to let it be that we’ll never understand each other, I think I actually prefer it that way.
ps. Adam your spellcheck blows, it didn’t have arse, wanker, fuckwit or Hermes.
