I’m here, but am I really here?
I just met a lovely person on the plane flying home, Stephanie. Nice person, good perspective on life and wore this fantastic top with Japanese-inspired styles.
Considerably out of my league (btw, I’m wearing my diving t-shirt and a pair of jeans, bad breath and a whole world of self pity 
)
Sadness is still the theme I’m afraid, but I’m going to try to quantify my experiences, not dribble through them and hopefully gain some perspective on where it takes me.
Missed out on socialising with my work colleague this weekend (unfortunately), but other endeavours out of my control became a part of the fabric of my weekend. Did however get to meet some friends of Matt’s (Pete and Jen), who are lively, funny and totally in love with each other (or possibly I just notice it more when i’m not attached).
Went to the festival of the beers yesterday, and as much as the three of us were committed to making something of it, it really just fizzled out. Beer was exotic but mostly awful, company was good but we’re all at different stages, all searching for our own things, and the interesting people left long before we were drunk enough to make any impact.
So i’m back home, and about to get changed, head back to work and try to make a concerted effort at achieving what work has been piling up on my desk for the past few weeks. I’m hoping to speak to my boss and get some positive feedback about the possibility of Melbourne, so everyone cross fingers and toes for me, and soon I’ll be jetsetting again.
Through all of this i’m looking to reduce complexity, but have only succeeded in making a life that’s disconnected from reality, and disconnected from what I care about, in favour of social acceptance and singular sorrow.
So I suppose the question, i’m here, but am I really here????……
Adam
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